When I contemplate, as I often do, on the many failings I feel I have as a parent (hey its our job to beat ourselves up, right?), no matter how shit I am at cooking, making things, miraculously sewing an amazing costume with one hours notice, you know, the usual.....no matter what, I will NEVER be as bad as the parents who tricked their kid into thinking he had Ebola!! Evil poxy mo*********rs!! (I didn't swear, I didn't! Truckers! I said truckers!)
No matter how grumpy, moody, mardy, tantrummy, ungrateful, bratty, picky, argumentative, annoying, sarcastic - well you get the picture - they are, I simply am not evil enough to pretend they've got a disease that might kill them!! I have a very VERY warped sense of humour, I mean, as in I'm going to hell kinda warped - anyone who knows me knows that - they've usually booked the seat next to me.....but even I, just couldn't, wouldn't, and would never have even THOUGHT of doing something like that! I mean there was a time many years ago when I hadn't slept for two weeks that I felt like throwing my baby out of the window through sheer hallucinations & sleep deprivation, but I wouldn't have actually DONE it! (I checked with my health visitor to see if I'd turned into a mad psycho murderer and she said no, most mums whose babies suddenly decide they don't need to sleep feel that way too after a while, then she made me sleep train him....whole new story!) I know I take the piss, damn, its part of the job description, but my kids ALWAYS know when I'm being humorous, playing a joke etc., and when I'm deadly serious. Oh god, I sound all boring and preachy now! I don't like boring and preachy! But hey, its not often I see such a bad example of parenting that it makes me feel like SuperMum, so I'm taking the smug, moral high ground while I can!! Its kinda like watching Eastenders - it makes you happy with your life when you think you too could have a crap, miserable existence, like all the inhabitants of Albert Square! What gets you all riled up and gets your Mummy feathers all ruffled up? Is it just me?! Here's a link to the video, just because its going viral as "funny". I laugh a lot, and at all the crap jokes too, but either I'm growing up, having a humour malfunction, or my Mummy instincts are just not letting this one slide because I really cant see the funny side in even, for a split second, letting your child think he might die!! Please feel free to comment and tell me, before I start getting all deep or something! 😱 http://youtu.be/NbtsssN7r8w (see how its titled as Funny! Yeah as funny as the Grim Reaper pointing at you with a sign saying "you're next" at a funeral! Actually.....that could be quite entertaining....depends on the person....😏😈) Night all, and feel free to tell me I'm being all wet and sensible/boring....although if you don't have kids you probably would actually find this funny, parents probably wouldn't. Unless they didn't like their kids in which case they might. I'm rambling, good night! 😴 X
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AuthorI'm just a Mum with an abnormal family, here to make everyone else feel normal Archives
January 2018
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