Well hello my fellow slummies, it's been a while! I've been putting a lot of efforts into writing my book, although that is a LONG way off!
Todays' news though, really got under my skin a bit. I'm sure you've read about the headteacher asking parents to turn up to school in actual clothes instead of pyjamas. If you've missed this highly controversial news item, you can read it HERE.
Basically a head teacher in Darlington sent out notes to ask parents to stop wearing pyjamas to school and one mum refused point blank and went in in her pyjamas.
Now, I'm the first to admit I am a somewhat slummy mummy, obviously, and anywhere I can find a shortcut, I will find one! I've been known to kick a dustbunny back under the sofa from whence it came, I soak the dishes in hot water for a good couple of hours to make washing up easy, I have a mountain of clean laundry that needs putting away and I will rope the kids in to put their own clothes away once I've sorted them. I've given the children McDonalds for tea, cereal, toast, anything I can get my hands on to fill them up and keep them quiet when I've completely forgotten to get any shopping in. We run out of milk on a fairly regular basis because no matter how much I buy, my eldest drinks his own body weight of it, I've dusted only things that you can see the dust on and ignored other shelves or ornaments that don't show the dust easily. I've pushed with all my might, down on the full bin to attempt to get one more evening of not having to empty my kitchen bin into the wheelie bin outside in the rain, which is generally surrounded by dog poo (because why pick up dog poo in the rain when you can wait until its dry and erm, of a consistency that is also slightly drier, if you catch my drift! (All dog owners will!). I've occasionally had to put the children in the same trousers two days in a row because I've forgotten to put the washer or dryer on, I avoid ironing in all shapes and forms and do my utmost to ensure nothing in any of our cupboards needs ironing. I wash up once a day, after soaking the dishes in hot soapy water, I then add the tea time plates or bowls and wash everything up then. Anything used after that has to wait until the following day! There are reasons for this, and being lazy isn't one of them. Far from it. Although I'm sure if I was a 'normal' mum, I'd still do these things just to get 5 minutes sit down with a magazine or glass of Prosecco in the evening!
The thing is, I have illnesses and some disabilities which cause me tremendous pain, even just washing up. So I find short cuts so I don't end up on my knees crying in agony, and to fit in more cuddle time with my kids. And I know there are tonnes of mums out there who have just vacuumed the front room to be confronted by a dust bunny that's rolled out from under a cupboard who has shoved it back under instead of picking it up or getting the hoover back out. I will always find shortcuts because I'm not a Stepford Wife, and I like to spend time hugging my children and snuggling up under blankets rather than dusting ornaments. These are the shortcuts that make us slummy mummies. We shortcut the horrible but necessary boring chores in order to do something more fun, because otherwise what is the point of life? I don't want my gravestone to say "her housework will be greatly missed, what a gorgeous show home she had!". If that makes me slummy then so what??
In the mornings I set my alarm clock to allow me an extra minute to get dressed into clothes. I may have a mad panic and have been known to put back on yesterdays clothes because all my clean stuff is in the bottom of a pile of clean clothes SOMEWHERE, but god knows where. So long as I am dressed! Despite my illness and disabilities I get my children to school in good time, in clean (ish) clothes, washed and brushed (not that you'd ever know with their wild curly locks and finger nails that attract dirt like those little magnet toys that attract iron filings). I have never, once, ever, and never will, leave my house in my nightwear. Not only are my PJs short ones so I'd freeze to death, but I also wear nighties and they are pretty knackered and entirely non-sexy. I set my alarm clock to include actually dressing in some form of clothes.
This 'mother' turned up not only in her PJs but without her false teeth apparently. And just so happened to 'not realise' and also managed to get the press there to photograph her in her full glorious PJs.
Why?? Surely it can't be pure laziness? It takes a normal fit person about 30 seconds to put some clothes on! You've managed to get your child washed and dressed, at what point would you think "hmmm, if I don't get dressed I'll get an extra sip of coffee"?! What about your poor child?! I mean, it's our job to embarrass our kids, let's face it, and I kind of enjoy it too! Telling them you love them and asking for a kiss in front of their friends is all part of the child/parent relationship! But do they not realise how humiliated those children must feel when all the other kids are whispering about the mum at the gate in nightwear and without their false teeth? I mean, it's hardly likely to make them proud to have you as a parent is it? No, humiliation only comes into play when you throw them their 18th or 21st birthday party and put up all the pictures of them naked in the sink up on the walls (and in my case, print outs of this website stating what they got up to! Oh they are going to hate me....!). But that's a normal rite of passage and they are actually adults then, not little children that could possibly get bullied by their peers. Could you show any more disrespect to your own child and the school that you chose to give your child the best education they can get, no matter what kind of area you are in. You chose that school to teach and help shape your child, should you not show the school some respect also? Why would you disrespect a place full of people that look after your children for 6 hours a day?! I'd be slipping them twenties and saying make sure they get one on one teaching, they deserve to go to Oxford one day! Regardless of class, neighbourhood, any of the things they blame, wouldn't you want your child to be the best they can be?
The infamous and mainly hated Katie Hopkins has already commented on this storyline (you can read her views HERE) and for once, and you'll probably never hear me say this ever again, I actually agree with her! Kids follow what we do, how will they ever learn to dress themselves if their parents can't be bothered??
What do you think? A big fuss about nothing? Do you wear your PJs on the school run? Or do you think the least we can do is have the self respect for ourselves, and respect for our children and their school, to turn up fairly clean and kempt, you know, just enough for a glancing eye?
It's not often that I talk about 'serious' subjects, or subjects in the news but I was really insulted that she was entitled a Slummy Mummy because that's an insult to us Slummies! Scummy Mummies more like, how dare they associate us and our odd dustbunnies with people who cant be bothered to get dressed and brush their teeth (or forget their teeth altogether!)
Until next time Slummies!