Snow Day From Hell

Snow day. That's all I need to say isn't it really?

Took me an hour and 15 minutes of skidding and sliding my Fiat 500, AKA the Snowmobile, to leave my house and go 200 metres round the corner in the direction of school, just to eventually turn round and come home. Traffic was a standstill all day. It's almost like the council have completely missed the news about storm Juno which has been ALL over the media! 

Kids have been demanding. That's all I can say.

One broke a leg off the table so there was a whole to-do with superglue, nails and hammers, and I eventually resorted to duck tape and begging my mum (I'm 40!!) for financial assistance to purchase a new table! 

The dog ate the food that slid off the table when it collapsed. 

I had to put out my wheelie bin through the "dog turd zone" which I obviously normally scoop up first but as it was covered in three inches of snow I ended up using a shit shoveller to poke snow every step until I hit brown. Scooped most of it away and got the wheelie bins out before finding, somehow, yet more dog turd in the dry patch under the wheelie bins! How he got it under there I don't know! 

Lovely.

The children have driven me mad. After a mad play in the snow I popped coat and gloves on the conservatory heater.

When I smelled a distinct burnt toast kind of smell I realised the heater was on full and now the coat and gloves have a lovely griddled effect of brown lines on them. Oops. They are kinda crunchy too. 

I had to send the kids to bed early, they've literally done my head in, totally beat me and worn me down today, but they're mess-arsing about up there and the tension I'm feeling now is like a tightly stretched elastic band being twanged - eventually, it's going to snap. And it's going to HURT. 

The fact one child just came downstairs - to which I duly warned her through gritted teeth that bad bad things would happen if she didn't trot back up them quick smart - and said the boys were keeping her awake all wide eyed and innocence, but then went back upstairs with a large plastic sword, tells me it might be a long evening.

Snow - it's been wild. Now eff off and just let the rain back! Please god just rain it all away!!! 😱 (If you can't see that emoji, it's the one from the famous painting, The Scream. That's me right now.)

One day off school is quite enough, please please don't make it be two! I had a whole day of putting my feet up planned! 

⛄️