D'ya know, I'm pretty sure that when the sleep scientists suggested us insomniacs take a nice relaxing bath before bed (because we need specialists to work that out for us obviously), they didnt envisage that whilst running the said relaxing bath filled with aromatherapy oils to help you de-stress & sleep the night away, that you would be plunging the crap (quite literally) out of the overflowing toilet.
Because apparently some tiny lumberjack had decided to put a bloody LOG down our loo of such epic proportions that it needed an axe to chop it in half!! As I didn't have an axe handy it was left to me, bleach (for my hands) and a trusty, although fairly ineffective, plunger!
Thank you son, its always such a pleasure having this added scenario to my night time routine of tip-toeing through the Lego landmines, 1,000 small toys and various cats tails! As in real cats actual tails......we took in a gorgeous wee kitty tonight who is tiny and vulnerable but much like Shreks Puss in Boots, is also a lethal killer! According to the other 4 cats and the dog.
So tonight I have 3 cats upstairs with me - I believe they're trying to trip me up & kill me so they can take over the world, but that could just be paranoia - it would've been 4 but she was too scared to move & is hiding in the corner of the windowsill, plus the dog who also tried to get up here too. But she's so teeny and sweet! I suppose its not really an insult calling these 3 pussies is it?! 😂Ah good job I never wanted to be a comedienne eh?
Right I'm going in for the third plunging of the toilet with washing up liquid to lubricate (just how the hell did this even FIT inside a child's stomach if it won't go round a U bend?!?), if this doesn't work, I'm gonna start making them use litter trays! Ok, I'm not, but its kinda tempting.....please please let me be in my hot relaxing bath in the next 5 minutes....please.....